Cute

A puppy was born today and the world rejoiced. They carried the cute creature across many lands and waters until he arrived at his new home, the Temple of the Rambunctious Cuteness. He opened his eyes that evening and through the haze of newborn confusion and religious fervor saw no teat from which to suckle. Many of the surrounding observers offered their own teats to the puppy (mostly men), but were denied access to His High Puppiness for fear their milk was poison (especially the men).

The ministers of the Temple of the Rambunctious Cuteness knew well the proper diet for the leader of all the Universe's Cuterrians and offered His High Puppiness a small plate of crickets and raw bulgar. When the puppy ate neither offering, the ministers collectively chuckled and explained to the observing masses that the puppy had never tried either one.

"Soon," they said, "His Puppiness' inexperience will be obliterated by an abundance of curiosity. Then His Puppiness will feast on this great Cuterrian feast. Shortly thereafter His Puppiness will offer us advice on how we, too, can be so cute."

Three hours later, His High Puppiness died. While the natural cause of death could be attributed to starvation or malnutrition, the ministers insisted it was the lack of surrounding cute within the Temple.

"But fear not, followers!" the ministers proclaimed, "For His High Deceased Cuteness was one of a litter of seven. Each one cuter than the last."

The recordkeeper of the Temple of Rambunctious Cuteness made a small note on the death certificate about His Puppiness' apparent lack of cuteness with relation to his litter. The note went on for several pages.